♥//Lovely Dramatic

Saturday, October 06, 2007

18 years//♥

Two days ago, October 4th, was your 18th birthday. Maybe it wasn't.. maybe you're younger really, or older. I can't really be sure.. since I never really knew if the things you told me where the truth or a lie. And even when we weren't apart.. I always thought you'd end up doing me like you did your friends in China. I know you cared for them.. but you moved on and there was nothing you could do, right? But when you told me that.. so easy and carefree.. I honestly was disgusted by you for that moment. I could not believe you could leave your friends just like that and simply say, "There was nothing that could have been done. It can't be helped." Maybe that's true.. but you didn't show sorrow or pain or any weak points.. You just brushed it off and took it for what it was. I couldn't believe I was in the presence of a person like you. I was disgusted. And as much as I couldn't get over the ease you'd shown to me, I also couldn't shake the fear of experiencing the same thing. Honestly, the fear was a lot stronger. Maybe it's me.. maybe I'm too weak and needy.. but I just can't bare to part from those who are important to me. I'd do whatever it takes to stay with them. Or I wouldn't be able to be fully happy.. knowing what "could have been".

So every time I was with you, even in anger, in silence, or even when I wasn't seen by you, I cherished those times. I truly did. I don't even know half of ANYTHING about you, but the laughs we shared, the fun we had, the problems we came across.. the way we solved them together, got in trouble together, took up for each other, helped each other out, grew closer, I knew all of that was real. No matter how many lies you've told or how many secrets you've kept, all that was real and that's all I needed. Because I was happy. Of course I was curious, but I didn't have to know about you because I enjoyed you and we enjoyed each other. That's what we had. Pure friendship. But you really don't know how much I cherished you. And you don't know how much pain I have inside of me.. bottled up from every thought of you. No matter how much I try to ignore the pain.. it keeps resurfacing. It's makes me ache, it makes me cry, it makes me feel empty. All those memories... they keep coming back to me. And you're no where around.

Maybe it's possible you feel this pain too? For your friends. You pretend to be cool, you make yourself believe you can brush it off, but really you're suffering. I remember all the pictures of them you had in your school folder. I'm sorry you had to leave them. At the same time, if you hadn't, we would of never met. But maybe, that would have been best for me.

Labels: events, life

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Ayu Galore on her 29th Year♥

From the beginning..

29 years alive and kicking, almost 10 years with Avex, 42 singles, 29 #1 singles, sold more than 45 million records in Japan alone being the top selling solo and female artist and the fourth top selling Japanese artist in history, Ayumi Hamasaki has turned, like stated 29 today, on October 2, 2007. Sometimes I wish she wasn't that old, haha, but then again it doesn't seem that old.. maybe for an artist.. but like Madonna, I do believe Ayumi will be performing, in the spotlight or not, for a LONG while. And that i'm glad for. I may have not bought many of her CD's or singles, and scrolls or posters, DVD or VHS, Ayupan dolls, decorations, etc. But I am someone who cherishes this person. So I can only celebrate her birth by myself and what I am doing here now.

A lot of goods; including magazine scans, general pictures and videos of her most recent stage.. those that I haven't already posted anyway.. and some of my old favorites to bring in the love, Lol. Anyway, please enjoy!!

Various/ Random images through the ages & The Life Of-

All oldies.. way way back :]

Oh my, Ayu looks pretty tanned! :D

Mid Times

Out w/ friends at amusement park

Ayu Shopping Pics

Promotional & Live Pictures-

Ayumi's ASIA -Tour of Secret-
Most images that are the same are different performances, as she went to Taiwan, Hong Kong, Tokyo, etc. That's why their a bit different :]

In Shanghai Promoting her A Best Black & White albums after the tour :]

The offset of Glitter/Fated single :] Great scans~

My Magazine Scans-

Vivi Magazine - January 2006

For her (Miss)Understood album.. shot in New York :]
Just a bonus because it's one of my favorite scans.. since everything else is like most recent x)

Four words: "I must have one!" Omg, Ayumi teams up with Sanrio and talks Lumix into making a special camera with her logo and hello kitty on it! :O (the last scan) She also apparently got ASH & DIAMONS to do the same.. (the phone straps in the picture) Here's where you can read about it! Anyway, all these are from her last tour during her ASIA -Tour of Secret- chapter..

Vivi Volume 85
Talkin' 2 Myself preparation, recording, and fun!

ViVi Volume 86
Behind the scenes & the making of, of Ayumi's newest PV's, Talkin' 2 Myself and Decision.. which by the way if you haven't seen yet have been featured on this entry ^_^

ViVi Volume 87
Ayumi Hamasaki's B-day Celebration + travel

Videos-

One recent CM featuring her recent single Talkin' 2 Myself :]

Two live performances: A-Nation 2004; Game & Inspire

One Recent PV: Talkin' 2 Myself

One Recent PV: Decision

Hope you've enjoyed these.. this is indeed my LONGEST post @__@

Labels: ayumi hamasaki, events, Magazine Scans, videos

♥//Blog Tunes

☆Photo Of The Moment

Strawberry Daiquiri + Lime Even though it is the season for big alcoholic celebration, 21st coming up, this summer was the very first time I had a drink at the bar. This wasn't the first, a few lines of ignited shots were, lol, but this was one especially made for me and my friend by the bartender at the end of the night~ I say very nice touch to the end of that part day, and a happy 21st birthday to me from Ai-Tune Karaoke x3

♥//The Blogger

Hi, I'm Portia! ^~^ If you dislike Asian what-so-ever, just leave. If you're offended by anything, just say so. If you'd like to stay, you're more than welcome. But make sure you at least leave a comment on the C-BOX. Thanks! <3

Age- 22 Gender- Female DOB- December 3rd Astrological Sign- Sagittarius Chinese Zodiac- Horse Occupation- Photography~ Location- Georgia, United States Attending- Some higher level teaching facility called "College". Fascinating, yeah? Blogging- 6 years 5 months I love anime, I love music, everything Kpop especially~ I love fashion, and my themes are always revolved around that. (besides my mood) This is a personal blog. Well.. 75% personal, 5% public, and 20% media. If you don't like the things I type, that's your problem and I suggest you handle it the best way fit. By NOT spamming me :D Or you could always just leave, that's a good way :P

♥//Loves..

.:.KPOP <33333

.:.Japanese stuff.. x3

.:.I’m probably the biggest [Ayumi Hamasaki] Fan in the U.S.. who is black, xD

.:.Afternoon rain♥ .:.The break of dawn .:.Late nights..

.:.Cute/adorable stuff .:.Pretty & really awesome girls .:.Cool, georgeous people.. .:.Asian girls/guys

.:.Girly clothes (even though I don't wear them)

.:.Street & Couture Fashions :3 .:.Costume Play♠ .:.Make-Up

.:.Anime(NANA, etc.) .:.Movies .:.MUSIC!!

.:.Mini Coopers *-* .:.Art .:.Males.. :3

.:.Morning Musume .:.Vivienne Westwood

.:.Photography .:.Vivienne Westwood Partying~~ x3

☆//Tags plz :]

If you don't know already, I answer under the name Poine.

ayumiroxallbitches@yahoo.com Yahoo!IM: littleportia Spammers: Spam my e-mail so it can automatically TRASH. That'll save me time from hurting your feelings and killing your ego... or banning you :D

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