Friday, April 13, 2007
April Showers? May Flowers :D
[Mood:] Fair[Listening to:] Nothing; watching Marmalade Boy
xD Wow, this blog title really gets me all lovey dovey feeling, lmao! Probably because I just finished watching two episodes of Marmalade Boy. The entry was suppose to be named something else but when I thought of April showers, I couldn't resist. lol.
Anyway, it's been exactly a month and 5 days since i've seen Tianzhen :(( I really hope she's not in Oklahoma. That way there's a better chance in seeing her. Hmm, maybe that's selfish, I mean I do want her to see her family, but this is the person I use to spend everyday with. School time, at the restaurant and I was the only person that broke her curfew. lol. I've called her, but I keep getting her machine, and I haven't been able to go to her restaurant. And.. I'm such a nice person.. gawd, why do I have to be so kind?! It ruins me!! The only chance I got to go to her restaurant, I ruined it by taking Jemmy home instead. She missed her bus and she didn't have her money anymore. So I asked my mom to take her home. After my mom took her home, she had no gas and she had to get back home to finished what she was doing before dark. She said by the time we go over there and come back, it'll be late.. so I couldn't go. T.T Me and my sincerity..ugh. I swear, whenever I do actually sacrifice something of mine to help someone, I never get anything good out of it. Not just that, but always an unfair outcome. *sigh*
BLAH. Random Ayumi scans for the April Showering, hahas~
Click to enlarge :))
SWEET MAGAZINE APRIL 2007
FRAU MAGAZINE APRIL 2007
(cover only)
EDIT: Today, I visited the teachers Tianzhen's would go to for help on her English Ms. James and Ms. Clark. But only Ms. James was there. Ever since Tianzhen left, I haven't been in to visit. Ms. James asked have I talked to Tianzhen, or seen her, but I said no. I mentioned I haven't been by her restaurant nor reached her by phone.. saying I only got her machine. Ms. James said she only got the machine also.. but talked to her sometime between March 13th and now.. an exact month. She said then, she was in Texas waiting for her plane to Oklahoma. T.T I don't know what to believe because Tianzhen lies to them because she doesn't want them to know everything since their adults, and she can't really trust them keeping her away from the law.. she is illegal, so she can't get too wound up. Me on the other hand, she tells me the truth. So I don't know if Ms. James was told the truth or a lie, but Tianzhen did tell her this.. so there must be something. Because she did say like 45 days or less she was going to Oklahoma.. and that was March 8th when she told me, so.. maybe. But then that means I can't go to her restaurant to see her. Or talk to her.. for I don't know how much longer. And I don't know if she just left for Spring Break or.. if she's still there.. or somewhere else.. it's all so sucky. T^T
Labels: ayumi hamasaki, life
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
I Fucking Hate Him.. but I really like him
I really really really can't stand school right now. And it's so sad why.I'm mad at myself for letting some boy get the best of my education...
I mean I wasn't even like that with Javarus. At least I could function.
Like three posts before this, if not, the one titled Aozora no Namida, I was talking about Toledo and posts before that and posts before that, and posts before that!
It's been a while since i've known how Toledo feels about me, and what other girls he likes better.. I actually knew before Spring Break, but I hadn't blogged about it because I was too sad.. then when I got over it, I didn't wanna blog about it because it made me bitter and it really wasn't all that serious. But NOW! But now, i'm like sooo fucking sure, and I'm disgusted with this knowledge and with myself.
Here's what happened. Remember when I said my friend Whitney found out I liked him? Okay, in fourth period, the 2 weeks before Spring Break, Toledo kept going to the back of the room sitting with some girl named Chelsea. So they kept flirting.. make matters worse, it was the same day I had planned to tell him everything. I was getting angered so I kept looking away from them. But at one point I looked up and they're faces were WAY to close.. they were smiling and laughing. I was sooo sick of it. So sick, I went to the bathroom to get some fresh air. (our bathroom as a huge window and a wall you can sit up on right next to it) I ended up being in the bathroom longer than normal and just went back to class. I avoided looking their way the rest of the period, but Whitney kept telling me what they were doing. And when the only time I did look up, it was the end of class, and Chelsea was bent over dancing nasty, and Toledo was right behind her. All up on her arse! I was furious all day long that day.. and got sad later all week. Because he kept bothering her and they kept flirting. For somebody who doesn't like a girl, he sure is persistent. -_-
So anyway, I forgot all about that. Plus, I wasn't SURE he liked her or any girl, so it's not fair to assume things when it wasn't positive. So I forgot about it.
But today, again in 4th period, Ms. Oliver was using a cake as an example for the perfect persuasive or whatever type of letter we have to write for the writing prep tomorrow. So we were all in a circle and Ms. Oliver was in the middle. Toledo had already been flirting with Chelsea, and they both got in trouble earlier on because Chelsea texted him and his phone wasn't silent. When we finished, Ms. Oliver was talking so much about Cake, Toledo went out and said, "You know what, well I really don't like cake. Or making them." Ms. Oliver said, "Well, who cares? So make it for your girl, i'm sure she loves cake." And then Toledo laughed and said, "Oh Chelsea, what's your favorite type of cake?" And she just smiled, "I'm not your girl." blushing away. Oh my gosh, I could of jumped up and killed her! She knows she likes him, I don't care if she is playing hard to get, If I had the chance to be with someone I liked and they said that to me, I would NOT be playing around. I friggin' hate girls who complain they can't do anything with the guy they like when the balls already in their court! There are like other girls who'd love to be in your place, so please don't play around. I mean really, if she's gonna be like that, give him to me!!
>_>
Anyway, so maybe i'm still considering telling him how I feel.. but then it's completely wrong. The last time I tried to do that, with Javarus, he was just so full of himself. He acted so casual like, Oh, okay. Another confession of love. I get those a lot. SOB! And acted as if I was afriad all this time and just couldn't bare to tell him. Yeah right. I mean, of course I hesitated, but I just didn't want to start drama. He was already dating some other girl, someone he cared about, so there was nothing I could do but forget him. And I only told him because I just didn't wanna hold that on my chest. And I believe Toledo will be too cheeky..and I hope he won't because i'll probably go off on him, xD
Labels: school
Who is the copier??
Omg, this is the utmost weirdest thing i've ever noticed! Total random post, but as soon as I heard this, I had to post it!!
I was on AH.org forums when I saw this post by chie.kitten:
I don't know if anyone noticed (or posted) but when I first listened to "Taskinst" by Ayumi Hamasaki, I realized at once that it sounds EXACTLY like the beginning of Hoobastank's "Don't Tell Me".
And sure enough, I listened, and it's the same intro bridge and ending. o_O
Listen for yourself. First listen to Taskinst by Ayumi, the whole thing..
And then Don't Tell Me until the second verse..
Then if you want, listen at the same time.. >.>
What does this mean???
This is weird, right?
The timing of the notes are identical, but the notes themselves are different. (Like, maybe one chord is C major and this other one is A minor, got it?) Things like this happen all the time with songs.. I mean there arn't that many different variations to make..and all the people in the world, someone thinks exactly like someone else.. But this on the other hand, the timing as I said is identical. I highly doubt this is a coincidence, for anyone who is also skeptical.
What do you all think?
--
Going to bed now, school tomorrow.
Bleh.. -_-
Oyasuminasai~
Labels: ayumi hamasaki, music
Sunday, April 08, 2007
Quiz From My Fellow Princess Dewi <3333
[Mood:] Tired of all this pain i'm in ;___;[Listening to:] Hiru no Tsuki (Daytime Moon) by Arai Akino
I was suppose to blog about my Spring Break two days ago..but there's so much to type and I haven't gotten all the pictures yet.. so it'll be up sometime next week for sure. :)
I liked this quiz, thanks for providing it Dewi. :]
On with my results.. ^^
• Toledo is the one that you love.
I like him a lot but I have a hard time believing that,
So I doubt I love him.. >_>
• Javarus is one you like but can't work out.
Who doesn't know that?! xD
Oh well, he's not for me anyway..
• You care most about Orange.
^___^ Yes, it's true, I love my BB~♥
• Tianzhen is the one who knows you very well.
Mm.. not sure about this,
but I know she's my most dear friend. :)
Love her to bits! ♥♥♥
• Zhakari is your lucky star.
o.o Just maybe..
don't know how, but I can believe that.
• Hiru No Tsuki (Daytime Moon) by Arai Akino is the song that matches with Toledo.
@.@ ..the song isn't even about anything but a peaceful scenery D:
This song actually makes me forget about Toledo.. >_>;
• Say it Right by Nelly Furtado is the song for Javarus.
Oh yes, this is so true. *nods*
• Happy Ending by Ayumi Hamasaki is the song that tells you most about YOUR mind.
Hmmm..
Shall we see?? *posts lyrics*
There are lots of stars
As if to fill the gap between thick clouds
They are shining like a prayer
Almost like a shout
And my chest is constricted
I hope the morning will come for me soon
Before I can't hide up my weakness
It's strange I feel so lonely at night
Only because you are not here
After how many times of
Committing a sin like this
Will I be inhuman?
Will I be invisible to everyone?
I find nothing I want in a place like this
Which I escaped and tumbled into
I rip my feelings off my heart
And stick a smile on the mask
Please take me away from here
Before everything becomes a memory
I felt I knew the meaning of love a little
After I had met you If I can finish my penance some day
If I'm forgiven some day ...
But I have no right after all that
To tell the definition of happiness
Well, I know better than anyone else
That a happy ending never suits me
• and All Good Things by Nelly Furtado is the song telling you how you feel about life.
Oh..this one touches me. lol. I really do look at life like that..
--
That's all..random post. God, I just got my hair done yesterday.. it hurts soooo bad. It's too tight. ;___;
Happy Easter <3333
I don't even eat eggs anymore. I've been through a stage of "I'm a vegetarian!" and stopped eating a lot of food. Even though after, I cheated that stage with eating bacon, I gave up on a lot of cheeses, eggs, steaks, pork (except bacon x3) milk (except cereal xD) and yogurt.
I'll still say happy easter though.
~Jyaane :)
